Time to Rebuild.

I finally did it. After years of constant harrassment, bickering, being beaten down time and again, slandered, and many other nasty things, I finally emailed mmy mom and said don't contact me again.

Extreme, maybe. Lets put it a little simpler. My mom told me to my face she wishes she'd never had me, and that I was a mistake. She outright blames me for her failed marriage. This is the marriage SHE couldn't stand to be in any longer, nd practically destroyed my life bitching and whining about, and then she leaves, my step dad gets a new girlfriend, suddenly she wants him back. If-I-can't-have-him-nobody-can syndrome much?

She gave you 15 year old sister anorexia. Before you can debate this fact, let me give you the story. My sister is short for her age, shorter than most 12 year olds, and she's always been average weight, even though she wears it a little thicker due to her height. My mom put her on a diet, so my already insecure sister assumed she was not only short but fat, and starved herself right under my mom's nose until she had bleeding ulcers and cysts throughout her body and was admitted to hospital.

This same mother calls me a compulsive liar, and LIED herself to me about my sister's condition, deciding it wiser instead to tell me she has appendicitis. Refuses to keep me updated on my sister even when I text her, and when I call. And then tells me I never tried to keep updated on how she was.

The same mother that pretty much destroyed my life, and ignored every chance of helping me she could. Instead of offering to get me help when she discovered I was a severe self harmer, she wrapped her hands around my throat. She'll blame me for anything and everything possible.

My mom is the reason I have social interaction problems, because she moved us around every two years so she could switch to a different job. I never had any friends because I wasn't around long enough to make them. I was bullied because I was a bookworm, because I had no friends, and when I tried to go to my mom about these things, she made it into a competition, my life was harder than yours kinda competition.

She's the reason I ended up out on the streets for two years, she's the reason I wake up every day wondering why I'm still breathing when I can't do anything right. She's the reason I believe I'm horrifically fat and hideouly ugly, even though not a single person I meet agrees with this at all. She's the reason I battled bulimia for three years, because she made me believe such hateful things about myself. She's the reason why I hate mmyself and can't change my view of the world.

I'm a twisted person for growing up in that household. Hopefully there is now light at the end of this tunnel. I can finally focus on the most important things in my life. me and Kyle and his family. I love my grandma, she's been my pillar of strength no matter what. And things will start to get better now, I can start climbing that ladder up from the bottom of the well.

Enjoy your day.