The story

After a few days of blogging the finer details of my day (heh) I figure that as this is focused on my relationship, I should maybe tell my tale.

I met Ky playing World of Warcraft, at the time I was engaged to another guy (yes...yes...I know) and staying in Las Vegas. We were in the same guild, and he logged into vent and joined myself and some friends chatting. Now I don't quite know what happened in the first hour, but suddenly I get a whisper from my friend Dwayne saying "you know you're driving him crazy right?"

So this gets me to thinking. How long had it been since I drove someone crazy. My fiance at the time was a workaholic, no time for me, so I became addicted to the computer screen. It destroyed our relationship. And I was feeling sorely neglected, and he was a guild member I hadn't really met yet, so I shot him a whisper. We flirted a little, he'd been drinking, we were hangin out and having a good time. My partner at the time came home, so we decided to call it a night, but made plans to meet up and hang out the next day.

He didn't show the next day. I was a little hurt, more than a little upset, and all my self confidence flew straight out of the window. I was just getting ready to sign out when he logged in, apologizing profusely. He'd been in a car accident, and had to sort all that out before he could race home to see me. My heart melted and I spent another three hours making sure he was ok and just talking.

We spent every day together after that, I knew his work schedule, we would hang out before work and for a few hours after he got home. It was fantastic, we soon feel into a relationship category, while I was still engaged to another guy, although anyone who really knew us had been able to tell for a while that it was over.

When I got back to the UK in January, my engagement was broken off. I have no contact with that man anymore, I've moved on with my life and regret nothing. Ky and I had a fantastic time, although seeing each other was harder with the time difference. Then my home life got bad, and Ky panicked about the distance, and broke things off in February. My soul was shattered, I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, didn't know what to do. I thought I was crazy at the time, I couldn't bring myself to believe for a while I was mourning the loss of my true love.

We stayed in touch, never lost touch for more than a week, we still cared deeply for one another, and found ourselves unable to keep our hands to ourselves a lot of the time. I didn't date at all, didn't want to date anyone else, I was holding out in the hopes I would get my man back. In April, he decided he had to see me, to decide whether he wanted me or wanted to move on.

I flew out to Florida in early May. The flights were a nightmare, let me tell you. First flight was delayed by hours, causing me to miss my connection and barely manage to get a seat on the next flight. By the time I got there, it was 5 hours after I was supposed to be there, and somewhere along the line I'm got a digit in Ky's phone number wrong and couldn't call him. I expected him not to be there, I expected to have to get to the hotel and spend a week in misery praying he would come to the hotel. His face grinning at me across the airport is a moment I'll never forget for as long as I live. When I saw him, I thought "that's the man I'm going to love for the rest of my life, whether he wants me or not"

We had a fantastic week together, saw some friends, ate out, watched a few movies.....and the sex....*whistle* mmmm mmmm MMM. Towards the end of my stay, we had some serious chats about our relationship, most of which ended with me in tears. One conversation, Ky made to say something, then stopped. I hampered him all day for what he was going to say, he refused, he'd tell me later....always later. Eventually I gave up and forgot about it.

It rained so bad the day I was leaving. Poured. We could barely see the road. I couldn't let go of him in the airport, and he just held me while I cried like a child. Eventually I got on my plane and got back, where I let him know I was safe and everything was ok.

Time went by, we stayed as we were, friends with benefits for the most part, and our own little private jokes, like SKAHLUH! (you have to be a bones fanatic to get that) and it stayed that way til mid-end of June.

I upset him, and if you scroll down to the first post I ever made, we're bang on target with that, I wrote that the night I upset him really badly, and he stopped talking to me for a week. In that time I decided I was hurting him too badly and I should move on to save him any more pain and grief. So I got involved with a mutual friend, who'd been crazy about my accent since he met me. I'm an honest person, so when Ky and I started speaking again I told him what was going on. Oh dear. Bad move. He went insane. Totally insane. I immediately regretted it, he said some pretty hurtful things, and I retaliated, and we acted like worst enemies for a week.

About this time, I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. It was bad, my doctor said. I had to be tested for uterine cancer, it was that bad. There was talk of hysterectomies, allsorts. I was terrified. I didn't know what to do, so I turned to the only source of support I'd ever been able to rely on....Ky.

At first he was dubious about talking to me. As I sobbed and told him what was going on. He softened. He was there for me, like he always was. And I loved him even more for being there for me no matter what happened. Eventually the medical professionals all agreed that it was nowhere near as serious as they thought, and I may even be able to have children one day.

A few days later Ky got drunk, I broke things off with the friend a few days before because I couldn't keep seeing him knowing how I felt about Ky, but Ky never knew that, he thought I was still seeing him. And he got into vent and cried. And screamed. And demanded to know what right this guy had to edge in on "his girl". A long long long talk ensued, with a lot of reasoning on both sides.

A short time into the conversation, Ky said. "I want to tell you what I was going to say now." It took me a moment to work out what he meant, then I realized. What he was going to say while I was there, that he refused to tell me. So I said ok, and I waited, almost shaking with nerves, while he took a deep breath and said,

"I don't know if I love you, I don't know if I can, but I want to spend the rest of my life finding out"

I cried. He cried. We wept on each others shoulders. I told him how much I loved him, how I'd always loved him, and would never stop loving him. And we decided that night to make it work. June 29th, 2009. And as for where we are now? I love him more today, than I did yesterday, and less than I will tomorrow. And he is always by my side, no matter what the distance. True love really can conquer all.

Enjoy your day!